“Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it.”
Henry David Thoreau
The most powerful success secret known to man – that is quite a bold claim, is it not?
What causes some people to be successful and others to fail? Is there a success formula that, when completely embraced, has the power to revolutionize your life?
All tremendously successful people have ONE, single, only “secret of success” that they universally share and rely on beyond all other success secrets.
And it is my belief that anyone who learns, accepts, understands, and prioritizes this one secret can and will swiftly achieve incredible achievements in their lives.
So, what is this single most powerful secret to success? Is there really a magic formula for controlling every aspect of your life?
There was a point in my life when I was completely broke. I had to sell my automobile to pay off my credit card debts.
We all have moments of desperation. But, if we can meet them head on, we’ll discover just how powerful we are.
Well, back then, I was not able to discover how powerful I was.
But I did stumble upon a quote by the legendary author Earl Nightingale:
“People are where they are because that is exactly where they really want to be, – whether they will admit that or not.”
This quote did not sit well with me at the time. However, it caused me to toss and turn in bed for several sleepless nights.
I could not stop pondering how I got myself into this situation.
“People are where they are because that is exactly where they really want to be.”
The statement played in my head like a broken record for days.
And then, one fine day, it just dawned upon me…
One day, I realized that my life had spun out of control for one simple reason. It has everything to do with a “miracle formula”. One that I ignored.
This is the formula, probably the single most powerful success secret known to man:
That’s exactly what I and everyone on the face of this planet wants – control. To have complete control over my life now and in the future.
I don’t think there is anybody out there who has their head screwed on right would not want more control. But control comes with a price.
A price that not everyone is willing to pay.
The price is RESPONSIBILITY.
As much as you yearned for control of your life, would it be absurd to suggest that you’re the one who relinquished it?
Whenever you make statements like the ones below, you have given away your responsibility:
“I am not good enough.”
“I don’t have what it takes.”
“I’m waiting for the right moment.”
“I don’t have the money.”
“I am too busy.”
“I’m afraid of the competition.”
“I don’t have the time.”
There are a lot more of these excuses, but I think you get the picture. When we refuse to accept responsibility, we relinquish power.
When something goes wrong, whether it is a minor or major issue, the mind will present you with three options:
It is much easier to lay blame or justify when things go wrong. However, you must think that you are greater than your problems in order to regain control of your life.
Being responsible will assure you that you have the power and ability to resolve the problem.
Once you are able to get to that place of responsibility, you will be ready to tackle your self-imposed limitations.
Our behavior, our thoughts, and our actions are the products of our psyche. This is the whole of our intellect, which helps us navigate through life.
You can be far more than you are right now. As humans, our potential for growth is limitless. But if there are no limits and everything is possible, then what, or who, is preventing us from realizing our potential?
It is not because of the environment we are in. We have witnessed countless successful individuals emerge from the very worst environments. The answer to this is NOT out there.
It has nothing to do with anything external. We have limitations because of our beliefs. Your limitations are the result of your psyche—your thoughts, behaviors, and actions.
The diagram below will shed some light on what self-imposed limitations do to impede your success. There are two circles. The inner white circle is where you are.
It also indicates to you where your self-imposed limits have gotten you so far. When you set a limit, you are limiting what can be accomplished.
Even though you are perfectly capable, you will never progress beyond your self-imposed limits. Your self-imposed limitations are inextricably linked to your self-perception.
Unless your self-esteem improves and you believe you are capable of more, you’ll continue to underperform.
When you conquer your limitations and recognize your limitless potential for progress, you’ll be in the blue outer circle. Limitations are just imaginary boundaries (white circle) that you set for yourself and prevent you from living a fulfilled life.
Have you ever wondered why you haven’t yet achieved the results you want in life? Your emotional baggage from the past is most likely preventing you from doing so.
Excessive past emotional baggage could be one of the self-imposed constraints weighing you down.
Do not allow your baggage to define who you are. Some of this baggage may have started out as labels during childhood.
Labels have a strong impact on children, and some of these labels may linger with them for a long time.
When a parent classifies a child as “clever,” “stupid,” or “clumsy,” the child almost always proves the parent right. Labels typically cause more harm than good since they frequently lead to unspoken bias and isolation.
And society appears too eager to attach labels to people. When these labels are internalized, they get ingrained into your psyche.
Nonetheless, these are some of the people who have defied the odds despite having labels attached to them:
You’ll be interpreting what other people say based on the words’ actual meaning.
If you were often labeled negatively as a child, it may have hampered your ability to grow and evolve. Negative cognitive patterns may have been created as a result of the labelling.
To regain control of your life, you need to shed the emotional baggage from your life. Perhaps a good way to start this process is to ask yourself this question:
“Why do I carry the baggage if it does not help me to become the person I want to be?”
To get rid of your baggage, figure out what it is that keeps you stuck in the past. List down all the thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors that are weighing you down.
When you are doing this, be honest with yourself, suspend all judgement and write whatever comes to mind.
Now that you have discovered the single most powerful success secret known to man:
What are you prepared to do with this information/fact/truth?
Let’s start by looking at what “responsibility” really means.
As a responsible person, you must be able to make informed choices and participate in activities that help you grow. Being responsible means, you are able to accept the consequences of your own actions and decisions.
Responsibility is empowering. When broken down into two words, “response” and “ability,” “response” simply means the ability to respond rather than react.
Now, responding and reacting are worlds apart. Reacting is a natural and reciprocal process. Responding, on the other hand, requires you to take into consideration the desired result.
Reacting is emotional. It’s driven by your unconscious mind’s preconceptions, biases, and prejudices.
When you say or do something “without thinking,” it is actually your unconscious mind that is running the show.
Reaction may sometimes provide an unfavorable outcome because it is survival-based. It is done on impulse and ignores the long-term consequences of what you do or say.
Even though a reaction might initially turn out fine, it is often something you might regret later.
Responding requires reasoning and emotional intelligence. It requires both your conscious and unconscious mind to process the information before any action can be initiated.
You will consider the long-term consequences and adhere to your basic principles. Whether you choose to react or respond, it is your choice. It is your response ability.
You may not be to blame for the majority of what occurs in the world. But you are solely responsible for how you react to it.
When confronted with a challenging scenario, you have the option of acting irresponsibly by becoming defensive, furious, or running away. Many will do this without thinking about it, and it exacerbates the problem.
As a response-able person, you will consider your options. Being response-able is exercising all of your self-control, skill, and knowledge to look after yourself, even when it is challenging.
Allow the act of being “response-able” to help you stack the odds in your favor and assume control of your life. Responsibility entails authority, leadership, and maturity, being trustworthy and dependable.
Following the act of being “response-able” is the act of being accountable. Accountability is the state of being liable or answerable for something.
When there is accountability and responsibility in your life. This is the state of complete responsibility. And once it becomes part of you, it will give you the control you desire over your life. Eventually, it translates to total freedom.
I sincerely hope that you will find value from this piece of information and that it is useful and inspiring enough to help you find your place in life.
Philosopher and poet Ralph Waldo Emerson once said:
“The world belongs to the energetic.”
Hence, go forth into the world and make your mark with boundless energy and enthusiasm. I’ll leave you with a quote from one of America’s early motivational writers, Dr. Orrison Swett Marden:
“A lobster, when left high and dry among the rocks, has no instinct and energy enough to work his way back to the sea, but waits for the sea to come to him…
If it does not come, he remains where he is and dies, although the slightest effort would enable him to reach the waves, which are perhaps within a yard of him.
The world is full of human lobsters: men stranded on the rocks of indecision and procrastination who, instead of putting forth their own energies, are waiting for some grand billow of good fortune to set them afloat.”
So, with responsibility, set yourself afloat with excitement, enthusiasm, and passion. And make the best of this one and only life that you have.